Thursday, 8 December 2022

Mike's Kitchen Nightmare

 


Hey dudes, here's a little slapstick story featuring some of the characters from the Sports Centre Alone series during their time in prison. Hope you enjoy!

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Mike, Aaron and Brad were halfway through their twelve month sentences for destruction of public property and what the judge had described as a “cruel and unusual” attempted food contamination after the three had been caught with their genitals buried in cafeteria food.

Unfortunately for the lads, their bizarre and incoherent ramblings about some mysterious younger high-school kids who had lured them into a series of nut-crunching traps had wrung hollow with both the judge and the jury; and with no trace of these so-called kids found on the site afterwards with Dylan having carefully erased the CCTV footage of the evening, not even the lads’ lawyer truthfully believed their innocence, so had done a pretty half-assed job defending them.

The jury had taken no time at all in reaching a unanimous guilty verdict, and the judge had no qualms about handing them a harsher than typical punishment for this kind of crime after having wasted so much of the court’s time with their idiotic and clearly made-up stories.

The case had brought a great deal of unwelcome media attention to Brad and Mike’s college, and the two had quickly found themselves expelled; Aaron too lost his coveted soccer scholarship that he had been due to commence after the summer.

To make matters worse, the boys’ cocks and balls had all been so massively damaged throughout the night that they had to be wrapped up in thick layers to assist the healing process – Mike hadn't seen his proud member in months and had been forced to suffer through repeated humiliating and painful medical examinations of them to monitor the progress he was making.

Fortunately for Mike, he had been healing at a faster rate than either Brad or Aaron, much to their chagrin, and had finally been allowed to have his junk removed from their bandage and gauze tomb earlier that day.

Mike had loved the feeling of the hot water running over his naked cock and balls for the first time in months in the showers that morning and had to work very hard not to pop a boner surrounded by the other inmates. Fuck though, tonight he was definitely gonna take Mike Junior for a test drive no matter how much Brad (now his cellmate) might protest. And he’d be sure to rub it into Aaron when they next saw him in the prison yard.

Yeah, Brad would sit their grim-faced and miserable as Mike worked his magic on the top bunk that night. Brad might have been the king of the jungle in college, but here in jail his prized dick was locked up in some kind of thick plastic tube owing to the particularly extreme damage his member had suffered. In another world he might feel sorry enough for his buddy not to torment him with a lengthy self-pleasure fest from within the very same cell, but Mike needed this. A quick sneaky jerk off in some kind of semi-discreet location away from the prying eyes of the guards just wasn’t gonna cut it; he needed a good long period of time to lay back, close his eyes and think of all the sexy college chicks his dick had been missing so badly. Yeah, he was Mike the Man, and tonight he was gonna prove it once again.

All he had to get through first was his shift in the prison’s mice-infested cafeteria. Mike had decided to make the most of his time in prison and pick up a new skill; everyone always needed a cook he figured, and despite the PTSD he regularly experienced from spying all the mousetraps left around the kitchen as part of the prison’s pest extermination program, he did find it genuinely rewarding – better than being cooped up in his cell all day like moody Brad who only ever left to shower, eat and lift weights.

Mike’s shift was going reasonably well as they started to prepare for the big daily lunch service. He had an incredibly energised feeling that came from finally feeling liberated below the waist.

Unfortunately however, after months of being denied sexual pleasure, Mike’s prick was a great deal more sensitive than usual. While he was carrying a heavy bag of flour over his shoulder, the mere sensation of his dick rubbing against the fabric of his underwear was enough to send it throbbing skywards as the stricken lad experienced his first hard-on since the incident at the sports centre.

Mike gulped at the embarrassing predicament he found himself in and was conscious that a couple of other inmates had already spotted his boner and were snickering about it to each other. Mike picked up the pace determined to get to his station on the other end of the kitchen before anyone else noticed.

Fate had other plans though, as one of the other prisoners had already snuck up behind him and yelled “Hey everybody! Mike’s got a boner!” before suddenly yanking Mike’s already-loose fitting bright orange pants down around his ankles causing a wave of laughter to erupt as Mike’s bouncing hard dick became more clearly visible through the fabric of his prison issued boxers.

The laughter continued as the force of Mike’s forward motion, the weight of the heavy bag of flour and the sudden obstacle that was his pants becoming entangled around his ankles all interacted to send the stricken lad stumbling forward smashing his pretty face into a frying pan hanging on a hook from the ceiling.

As he stumbled, dazed from the blow, he attempted to grab onto the countertop for balance but merely succeeded in knocking a toaster onto the floor as he fell. A sickening crunch echoed around the room followed by a groan as the bunched up front of Mike’s baggy crotch made direct impact with the toaster.

Worse, as Mike floundered in a desperate attempt to stand back up, he realised to his horror that his two precious balls had become jammed in one of the toaster’s slots. In a blind panic he leapt to his feet kicking off his pants and began tugging furiously at the jammed toaster.

“Aw hell naw dog, who tries to cook meatballs in a toaster” one of the other inmates hollered to the rowdy approval of the crowd.

Mike pulled and pulled at the jammed contraption as it yanked his nards further and further away from his body, his eyes desperately scanning the room for assistance, only to find everyone else laughing hysterically at his misfortune, a couple of other prisoners clutching their own ballbags in sympathy.

He began to wildly smash the toaster against the countertop, screaming louder and louder as with every yank and tug the pain from his nuts grew worse and worse. Eventually, after an almighty adrenaline rush, he finally managed to pull the toaster off of his bollocks with one massive yank, the force of which ripped his boxers clean off.

The toaster went firing into the crowd, smacking the fellow prisoner who had initially pantsed Mike square in the balls with a grim “CRUNCH”… the red-faced prankster was immediately sent plummeting to the floor coughing and spluttering – not that anyone noticed, all eyes were still on unfortunate Mike as the calamity continued.

Mike had been sent tumbling backwards by the sudden force and had fallen onto the stovetop behind him. A loud sizzle caused a series of grimaced looks to appear on the faces of the other inmates as the red-hot stove rings branded Mike’s naked ass.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Mike screamed at the top of his lungs, leaping off of the stovetop only to immediately be knocked off balance and land ass-fist on the floor, the momentum of his leap sending him sliding across the tiled surface until his feet slammed into the oven directly opposite.

The sudden collision sent a violent vibration through the oven, causing the pot of boiling water which had been sitting on top of it on the stove to come falling off. Mike watched in horror as the full-to-the-brim pot flipped over the edge of the stove and deposited its contents directly onto his naked lap before the edge of the pot itself slammed straight into the tip of his scorched dick.

 

***

“37… 38… 39…” Brad counted as he exhaled working on his biceps with a dumbbell in the exercise yard when he suddenly heard the loudest girl’s scream he’d ever heard in his life.


“When did they start letting chicks into this prison?” Brad muttered to himself “Ah fuck, I lost count… stupid bitch… 1… 2…”

***

 

Mike practically jumped out of his skin as he leapt to his feet, rushing towards a sink desperate for cold water but in his haste, he ran straight into the pool of water on the floor, slipping up and careening through the door of the nearby supply closet.

During a brief microsecond between fall and impact, Mike’s eyes bulged as he saw the open box lying in the middle of the supply closet floor. “Fuck…” he muttered before

*BOOM* *SMACK* *CLICK*

*BOOM* *SMACK* *CLICK*

*BOOM* *SMACK* *CLICK*

*BOOM* *SMACK* *CLICK*

*BOOM* *SMACK* *CLICK*

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!”

Mike screamed as he landed crotch first into a box of mousetraps. He let out a final deep, defeated groan before mercilessly passing out from the excruciating pain. The other prisoners quickly alerted the prison infirmary, and he was rushed off to get urgent medical attention for the seven mousetraps that had attached themselves to his thighs, cock and balls.

 

***

That night in the cell as Brad did push-ups on the floor, Mike laid awake with jealousy, as he had most other nights whenever he could hear the faint sound of some other prisoner clearly jacking off in a nearby cell.

“That should be me right now” he muttered to himself pitifully while staring at his rebandaged and re-gauzed junk.

He stared up at the ceiling.

“I’m gonna fucking kill those kids.” Mike spat through gritted teeth.

Brad paused his push-ups for a second and looked up at Mike.

“Nah bro, we’re gonna kill them.”

They both smiled wickedly.




2 comments:

  1. Merry Christmas :) This story is hilarious yet hot! Looking forward to what you have ready for 2023

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    Replies
    1. Merry Christmas to you too man! I'm glad you liked it, was so stoked to see you publishing again earlier, can't wait to see what 2023 brings for your awesome blog too!

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